A Pocket Guide to Mastering 3 Divorce Challenges
Divorce challenges can be difficult to overcome. The legal process can be tough. Day-to-day struggles can last a long time. Problems can revolve around emotional and financial concerns. Here are some common challenges divorcees face and how you can cope with them.
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Manage loneliness to overcome divorce challenges
Loneliness is a common problem after divorce. It’s okay to feel sad. But some divorcees may withdraw from their social circle and avoid social contact. Reduced motivation to pursue interests can lead to depressed feelings and a sense of hopelessness. This can be exacerbated by increased fatigue and disrupted sleeping patterns.
Loneliness can cause people to fall into negative patterns of thought and develop anxiety about the future. With no one to confide in, people can obsess about their relationship and if they caused the breakdown. Research suggests that loneliness impacts those who divorce later in life more. To quote directly:
Some research suggests that older adults who have ever divorced are socially and emotionally lonely compared to those who have had no changes in their marital history.
Manage these feelings proactively.
1. Develop a support network
A support system can help you overcome isolation and loneliness. There are different ways to find support.
Connect with friends and family
Make an effort to connect with your friends and family members. Plan days out and stay in contact over the phone. It can help to set up a weekly or fortnightly routine where a friend group get together on particular days. This can really help to instill a sense that you’re not alone. There are people who love and support you.
Find a support group
There are various social groups targeted at divorced individuals. These groups are a great way to connect with people who have similar concerns to you. This provides an opportunity to make new friends and maybe get advice on how others have managed their post-divorce life. If groups aren’t available locally, you can find them online through various social media like Facebook.
2. Social activities
Rediscover hobbies you may have stopped during marriage. Think about the activities that sparked the most joy. You can also try out new interests. It can seem daunting to try out a new hobby. But, there are ways to make it easier.
Attend classes or workshops.
Resources like YouTube have a wealth of useful information and tutorials.
Start with something small. You don’t need to get into something that’ll make you feel overwhelmed.
Allocate time to explore and enjoy the hobby.
Embrace a trial-and-error mindset. Don’t be afraid to fail. If you’re trying something new, you won’t get it right immediately.
3. Focus on self
There are different aspects to self-care.
Physical care
Physical exercise promotes good mental health as well as improving your fitness. Getting out of the house for a run is an easy and fun way to start an exercise routine. Asking a friend to join you can help to keep you motivated to continue your exercise.
Psychological care
Do what you enjoy. It’s also worth engaging in self-reflection and practicing meditation and relaxation techniques. If you’re struggling with your mental health, seeing a professional therapist can help greatly.
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Coping as divorced parents
Working out co-parenting arrangements is an important part of the divorce process. Most children benefit from both parents being in the child’s life. However, trying to cooperate with a former partner can be fraught with issues. If you’ve made parenting plans, how can you ensure that both parties follow the agreement?
1. Use co-parenting software
Misunderstandings and scheduling conflicts happen. There are many co-parenting apps available to help you stay on the same page with the other parent. Some apps provide a calendar you can use to collaborate with your ex-partner and keep track of major dates and visitation routines.
2. Communicate openly with your former partner
Communicate with the other parent if anything comes up. There are times when work or other obligations prevent a parent from adhering to a parenting plan. If this happens, discuss alternative plans with your co-parent as soon as possible. Always communicate respectfully. Research shows a clear connection between parental conflict and child outcomes. Respect each other’s boundaries. When your child is at the other parent’s house, constant check-ups shouldn’t be necessary.
3. Stay flexible
Circumstances change. It’s important to try to accommodate those changes. Reasonable alterations to a parenting plan or unforeseen emergencies can be resolved without conflict. If a plan is no longer workable, cooperate with your ex-spouse to find alternate plans that fit better.
4. Use constructive conflict resolution
It’s not uncommon for disagreements to arise. With proper conflict resolution methods in place, you can resolve disagreements without fighting. A part of conflict resolution is being willing to compromise. If you feel that you and your co-parent are unable to approach matters constructively, seek professional help from a mediator. A neutral third party can help parties discuss solutions moving forward.
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Managing your finances
Many people face financial instability after a divorce. Sensible planning can ensure a healthy financial future. Here are some things to keep in mind.
1. Seek financial support
Spousal maintenance and child support can be crucial in enabling divorced parties to support themselves in their new circumstances. You can ensure support continues by seeking legal assistance to enforce any payments your former partner fails to make. Spousal maintenance may even continue if you enter a new relationship depending on the financial arrangements with your new partner.
2. Create a post-divorce budget
Managing finances can be a daily challenge. Creating a budget will help you ensure all necessities are covered and help you maintain discipline. Think about your short and long-term goals. Is there a debt you want to pay off sooner rather than later? Would you like to build up a long-term emergency fund? Once you’ve categorised your income and expenses, review your spending habits regularly. If you find it difficult to stick to the budget, you may need to adjust it to better suit your needs. Here’s a sample budget template:
3. Adjust your lifestyle
Reassess your lifestyle after divorcing. Are there any unnecessary expenses you can cut? Try simplifying and focus on what’s really important to you. Moving into a smaller residence can make your living arrangements cheaper and easier to manage. Prioritise your spending based on what you need versus what you want.
4. Seek professional advice
A financial planner can help you make sense of your situation and organise your money. Setting financial boundaries and exploring potential investment opportunities can set you up for a bright future. Legal representation can ensure you receive support entitlements and an accountant will help you minimise your tax burden.
Conclusion for overcoming divorce challenges
It can be a painful experience trying to navigate any divorce challenges. Many face loneliness, co-parenting challenges, and financial difficulties. However, you can overcome these issues. With proper self-care and a strong support system, you can thrive after divorce. Working constructively with your ex-spouse is important for the welfare of your children. You can look after your financial future with proper advice and sensible lifestyle changes.
If you want professional legal advice, call us today for a free discovery call.